You're "generally happy," yet you spend your life dwelling on the past--that doesn't really sync up, does it? Most of us cringe when we're ambushed by memories of that regrettable weekend in Cleveland or the bout of crying in the bathroom at the office party, but … every day? Regrets, we've had a few, but we suspect that when you reflect on the movie of your life, you're fast-forwarding through all the slapstick scenes and romantic banter to pause only on the distressing moments, which blows them completely out of proportion.

You can change the way you think about your past, says Wellesley professor Theran. Paradoxically, one way to do it is to stay with your feelings of discomfort as they arise. "Expose yourself mentally to the feelings of shame or embarrassment long enough to allow them to increase and then decrease normally," she says. "Of course you're inclined to avoid your shameful memories, but that's the way they maintain their power. Try to tell yourself that you don't have to be perfect and that we all do silly or embarrassing things."

And here's another reason to give yourself a break: Chances are good that what haunts you has already been forgotten on the other end. "We all tend to have a stronger memory for these kinds of things than other people do," says Theran.

I constantly find myself pulling out the stray hairs on my arms so that all the hair is closer to being uniform in length. I'll do it while I'm watching TV or reading a book, but friends have pointed it out to me while we're in the middle of a conversation. Is this a sign of boredom or something else?

There's a name for this behavior: trichotillomania. "Usually, people who do this pull out the hair on their head, resulting in bald patches," says Christopher Peterson, PhD, of the University of Michigan. Some absently pull out a few hairs, while others go at it meticulously with tweezers. They may do it to relieve tension or just automatically--"much as you might be unaware of biting your fingernails," says David H. Barlow, PhD, an anxiety expert at Boston University. People who pull out their eyebrows or give themselves bald spots might be relieved to know that the condition is treatable. See a cognitive behavioral therapist and ask about newer antidepressants, which also treat anxiety.

Of course, whether you need treatment is up to you. Says Peterson, "If having hair-free arms is not a source of worry to you, then don't worry." That said, be mindful when you're out with friends, who may not appreciate a garnish in their guacamole.

I work in sales and recently had to give a talk in front of about a hundred people. For weeks, I dreaded it. By the time I had to speak, I was nauseated and almost fainting from fear. There were times when I thought I was going to drop right onto the podium. What's wrong with me?

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