I still want to get married and have kids , but I have a lot of friends who don't want to. I was discussing marriage with one boy I know, and he said, "I'm never ever getting married. " He took his parents' divorce really badly because his mother and father weren't friends afterwards-they were enemies, screaming on the phone to each other. I'm glad my parents are good friends, having lunch together and stufi. I think it's so much easier for the child if the parents are friendly. If they aren't, it's really difficuit because there's always a right side and a wrong side and the kids are just caught in the middle.

    I think I've grown up a little faster because of rny parents' divorce. It's made me realize more about the problems of life and helped me to understand my parents-and appreciate them as individuals. It's just too bad they couldn't have been as happy and productive as a couple as they've been since they've been on their own. And I also wish that the next time my mother has tickets for a Rolling Stonesl8 concert, she takes me instead of her boyfriend, which is what she did the last time!

Additional Information

  Heather, age eleven

    So we have to switch back and forth, doing it on a weekly basis seems to work the best. I'll try to make one room my real room and have the otherone Iike camping out. I can't buy two of everytlring, so I might as well have one good room that's really mine.

    Another aspect of josnt custody that's difficult is that my parents have very different rules and philosophies about life. For example, my Dad's attitude is that he lets us learn by our mistakes , and my mother does exactly the opposite-she tells us how to act before we make the mistake. And my Dad says we can watch TV for a while after school , and my Mom says we can'tthat we have to sel'ect our programs verv carefully.

At my Dad's house Matthew has to do his homework right away, but he gets to stay up until nine and watch The A I'eam because that's his favorite show. Mom doesn't want him to when we're at her house but she feels she has to give in because Matthew says, "Well, Daddy lets me do that at his house. " He's learning to play them against each other at a very early age. I don't do that, but I have to admit there are times when I secretly wish I was at whichever house I'm not at.

    It would be nice if there could be a special house for divorced families. It would be like two houses, side by side, with a place in the middle where the kids could live. Then when parents had arguments they could each go to their own place and get away from each other and think things out by themselves.

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